The Zoosk experiment

Well, not that old.

Well, not that old.

Blog #6

I was going to leave this one out but I’ll post it.

I spent a little bit of time on Zoosk, which cuts it too closely to a free “garbage dump” dating site to be really taken seriously.  I was on there just a couple days, if that, when I was messaged by, we’ll call her, Francine – a french gal from Montreal.

She had some nice photos up of herself, some a little seductive and she messaged me with great eagerness, a lot.

She really wanted to meet, soon and was asking when I got off work, would I be close by, when can I stop by!

It was a blizzard outside, and as much as I like meeting random strangers from the internet, I wasn’t going to chance wrapping my new car around a guardrail to meet one, that, lets be honest here, would likely end terribly anyway.

The next day the weather was clear so we set it up and I headed over.  During the drive my phone was exploding with texts from her, ding, ding, dingdingding, ding…

When I got into the parking lot the messages were:

Do you smoke? (no) I smoke, hope you dont mind.

How close are you?

Where are you now?

Hey??

Hello???

Yeah, really.

We met and boy had I ever just been duped.  Francine was supposedly 34 and attractive, but Francine hadn’t been 34 for at least 10 years, maybe more.

She had the figure of a tree stump, the face of a late 40’s chain smoker and the appeal of a brick wall.  The best part was what she wanted to do for our “date” – she wanted me to go with her and a friend to Costco, through rush hour traffic, and then go to a club afterwards.

I said I had to skip out on the Costco trip to go home and eat, but maybe I’d be down for the club later on – and I bounced.

She sent a few messages later on that all went unanswered, that was it for me and Francine, and Zoosk.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Angie date #2 – “group date, meet my single roommate”

Is it OK if I rewind this about 15 years?

Is it OK if I rewind this about 5 years?

Blog #4

A week after our first meeting, we got in touch again and decided on a date in her area.  I’d bring my dog, and she’d bring her niece and we’d all go for a walk.

I really had no clue what I was getting into, she had “cheeked me” at the ending of our first date and I’d be lying if I said our connection oozed with fireworks and chemistry class explosions, we just enjoyed each others company, so why not meet again.

I parked the car across from her building and sent her a note that I was outside with my dog, ready for our walk.

A few minutes later I saw Angie walking towards me with her 4 year old niece.  I gave her a quick brother-hug and cheek kiss which I don’t think she was expecting…

She also looked different from the first time I saw her, I think she left the make-up off this time, which is fine, but she indeed looked different.  She was also wearing worn out jogging pants and a winter jacket that had seen better days.  She looked and presented herself so much differently…like a mom.

Like a sack of bricks to the head “was this HER kid she was bringing along”?

Before I could erase the thought she told me that her roommate was coming and would be out soon.  Her roomie was the mother of the kid…wheew..

Now here comes her roommate walking up, open arms, “Hello, I’ve heard so much about you”.. and we hugged.

Now she looked like she was on a date!  Lots of make-up, deep red lipstick, long coat, yoga pants and leather boots.

As we were walking down the sidewalk and she continued to engage with me in conversation as Angie and the kid tagged along behind it all started to seem an awful lot like she was trying to hook me up with her roommate.  Even though her roomie was attractive, I still stayed close to Angie for the duration of the “group date” and the roomie slowly whittled back..

We had a great lunch and a great day overall, later on her roomie stayed home while myself, my dog, Angie and the kid went to the skating rink.  I had a great time skating with her 4 year old niece, who skated just as good as Gretzky or Crosby would’ve at the same age, and I was only asked if I was her father about 15~ times.  After our skate we went back to their apartment “so I could give my dog some water” but after just a few minutes I decided to head home.

“You dont want to stay for pasta” said the roomie..

“No thanks, I am pretty tired and better head out” (I was, but was also no closer to closing on Angie, nor did I even want to anymore)

We all mentioned how fun the day was as my dog and I entered the elevator as I left.

Ang sent me a note about 2 hours later making sure I made it home ok, and asked me to send her a couple short videos I’d made with my phone from the ice rink.  I emailed them to her, and asked her to let me know that she got them as they sent by Google drive which I’d never used before.

A few minutes later I heard the chime from my phone indicating a new Tinder message, but when I checked nothing was there.

Angie and I never spoke again.

 

 

 

 

My first Tinder date

30's dating

Blog #3

I only met two women through Tinder during the short time I used it.  The first girl, we’ll call Angie, had about 5 pictures, all very nice looking.  Her tagline was that she was new in town and worked in Engineering.

Right on.

Now most think Tinder is a hook-up app, and I am here to say this wasn’t what I was using it for, unless, you know, that just sorta happened.

After chatting on and off for a few days and not hearing from Angie, nor engaging with her, I figured like many others, our “chances” of meeting were dead in the water.  That is until she randomly sent me a “How are you?” a couple days after our previous convo.  We got to chatting and then she hit me with “So do you want to meet today”.

I responded with “Today!?” which at the time was a Sunday around 5pm.

She assured me she meant today before giving me her address.  I’d pick her up and we’d go out and grab a coffee, a drink or whatever. “Its your City, you pick the place” she said.

I pulled up and she got right into my car – Angie was hot.  Even if she didn’t look a thing like any of her pictures that I assume were all years old.

Tanned skin, dark eyes and hair, curves in all the right places and we started chatting right away.  We quickly decided to head up to Dave and Busters, if you’re unaware of the place its basically a Chucky Cheese for grown ups.  Billiards, video games, bars, restaurant etc.

When we arrived we went to the bar and each ordered a pint and continued chatting away.  There were no awkward moments (for me anyway), the conversation flowed nicely and then we went and played pool.  After an embarrassingly bad game of pool, we switched to video games at the other end of the building.  During our chats I also learned that Angie wasn’t an engineer.  She actually didn’t even have a job, she had been taking engineering in school but had recently changed to another major.  She was living with a family member and was going to school, hey, she was 28 after all and at least trying to improve herself – but far from the hot new in town engineer I thought I was encountering this evening, oh well. (Welcome to Tinder, folks)

At this point I would  lightly touch her on the small of her back when we were walking together between games, to kindly let her know that I was into her.  After a few more games we decided to call it a night and I’d drop her off.

During the ride home she mentioned twice what stuff we could do for date #2 and we both showed interest in it, which was outdoor ice skating.

When I dropped Angie off I went for a kiss after our hug and I got cheeked!  She got out of the car and I drove away in a bit of a shame “You just got cheeked” I was thinking as I drove off into the night, “but she agreed to a second date, hell, it was her idea…WTF”.

I was dating again, and this wouldn’t be the first time I’d be dumfounded and it certainly wasn’t the last.

See the next entry to read about the next meeting between Angie and I..

 

Using Tinder in your 30’s

30's dating

Blog post #2, let’s go over Tinder and what my experience was with it.

Keep in mind right off the bat that Tinder is free, and most (if not all) free dating sites are, from my experience, essentially garbage dumps.

The worst is women that use these as tools to boost their self esteem and ego.  An average looking girl with a few nice pictures (which is the bulk of women that use OLD ((online dating) can go from feeling like a zero, to a hero with a carefully made profile.  They get inundated with messages from crazed men and soon see themselves being able to pick and choose, while sifting though hundreds of messages, likely from men that wouldn’t even give them a second look in real life.

So I am saying Tinder, in the hands of many, is a popularity contest – but still, an average looking guy like me found myself with around 15-18 matches per week for the 2.5 weeks I was using it.  From my research I found that most guys weren’t getting responses from their matches, but there were only a few that didn’t respond to mine, and I chalked those up as another guy had gotten to them first as I had let them languish while I focused on others.

Often times witty banter messages would go back and forth for an evening and if I didn’t shoot for their phone number or get into a mutually enjoyable conversation we’d not speak the next day.  As new matches pile up, you start focusing on the new ones, chasing a high almost, just seeing what may lie ahead.

I chatted with many women on Tinder, and am as guilty as anyone else for using it to boost my battered ego.  In the end I only met 2 women from Tinder in our short stint together…

See blog post #3 for my Tinder dates

 

Online dating in your 30’s

Image

So here we are with blog post #1, which may or may not be a lengthy series going over my dates.  I am an average looking, single professional, 33 year old guy in a large city.  I am using online dating sites (we’ll get into specifics later) which all spurred from a short stint using Tinder a couple months ago after hearing that the Olympic athletes were using it in Sochi.

I had previously said I’d never online date, but thanks to Tinder here I am.

Going on two months in I’ve already met 8 women from the cyber bar and each is and has been unique.

I am learning too as I go, I am not an expert at this, but I welcome you to share in my destiny, which includes misery in my journey to find a mate from online dating.

Enjoy!