I recently read about a guy seeking “help” after his first date with a girl went completely sideways. This moron, for lack of better term, took the girl to the mall and had 12 children each walk up to her and hand her a red rose – from him.
And he was wondering why she bolted to the hills and blocked his number. And while this is clearly an extreme case of said epidemic, guys fall into this trap all too often. Not just with actions either, it’s usually words that will cause the lady to run away – most times before even meeting. Ever had a girl cancel your date 10 minutes before, because her brothers, best friends sisters rabbit got sick?
Then you have fallen into the trap – and its all you buddy.
To go on 1, 2 or 8 initial dates with someone new is really no different from when you met your best friend. Did you tell them they were your best friend, buy them a gift and then blow up their phone all before they had a chance to get home right after you first met? If you did then they aren’t your best friend – that person would have a restraining order on you.
Understand that women are emotional beings, while we
idiots are visual.
Too deep? Ok.
Women are crock pots, men are microwaves – make sense? They need time for their feelings to develop. This is where the old “wait 3 days until after the date to call her” came from in order to let her feelings develop. The other benefit of this, is that all beings look back after time with less than perfect vision – tending to remember the good, and not the bad. That’s where the “no contact rule” after a break up came from – and they both exist because they work.
Thinking that you need to “do something” during these periods is to dig your own grave. Why would a successful guy that has tons of options really care that much anyways?
Notice how the girls you don’t like chase you, but the ones you do like run away? This is why – it’s because you are treating them differently. The other example is men are like dogs and women are like cats – what does a cat do if you make sudden actions around them? They run. Now what does a cat do in which you ignore – it hops into your lap and starts to purr.
So meet to get to know her and have fun, ask questions, show interest, kiss her on the lips and then take a breather before running her off.