The Curvy Blonde

tumblr_ojbu6helzk1r564a5o1_1280

We met for a coffee in her part of the city and while our conversation flowed nicely, I wasn’t sure if I was all that attracted to her.  After coffee we went to another spot for food before I dropped her off.  A few days later she called me and asked if I would like to see her again – I said sure and set a time that I would pick her up and we would drive around and find a spot to chill at.

The reason I was more or less open to a 2nd date with her was because she stayed all covered up during the 1st and I really had no idea of what type of body she had and I wanted to see the goods.

Date day arrives and I drive to pick her up, meeting her at her front door.  We drove to a busy part of the city, parked the car and walked until we found a weird little hipster paradise that managed to screw up simple bacon and eggs.  Highlight moment was when she managed to spray her entire front-side with hot sauce while trying to get it to come out of the bottle – it looked like a crime scene and smelled absolutely horrid.

After eating (and her cleaning herself up with 400 napkins and a few trips to the ladies room) we left to go for another walk but soon ended up back at her place.

We had tea and watched TV but she made it clear that her bedroom was strictly off limits!  We kissed and played around before I called it a day and went home – knowing I wouldn’t be seeing her again.  She had a very structured vibe about herself and a little controlling which I don’t like.

She texted a few times before I told her there just wasn’t enough chemistry – just not enough click.  She rebutted that clearly all I wanted was sex and I just deleted the message.  No, I don’t go out on two dates with you, pay for everything all in the weak attempt to “use you” for sex.  If I wanted that I would have met her again, but I am not here to waste anyones time, including my own.

 

 

Advertisements

Guest Post: Why Over 30 Is The Best Age For Serious Relationships

pic1

Age is a strange thing. In your younger years you may feel so sure of what you want in a relationship and who you are, and you certainly have the energy to persue what you want and to get it. Though, as you move up through your twenties, something happens.
Nasty relationships, financial struggles and an awakening to the nature of the world may shake your confidence; you may become jaded and certain that dating is a waste of your time; or you may get so wrapped up in your professional career that you don’t take the time to foster those social skills which work to put you out there to prove your worth to the opposite sex.
Whatever the reason, dating through your twenties can be quite rocky, especially as you edge closer to your thirties while watching your friends getting picked off one by one by that special someone they have chosen to settle down with.
There is hope, and far more of it than you would think. The fact of the matter is that when you turn thirty, the dating world becomes clearer to navigate, less daunting than it ever was in your twenties, and far more rewarding than you could ever have imagined it would be.

You have a better idea of who you are

pic2

I struggle with the notion of young love, or love at first site. I acquaint these ideals with a sense of nativity that is often associated with youth. Chemistry between two people can come about for a number of reasons, and love and attraction are not always on the list.
There is a tendency in your youth to choose dating partners based on their aesthetic qualities, seeking perfection in beauty without considering whether you have something to offer in return for this or not. The truth is, when you are in your twenties, you likely don’t yet have the financial security and personal confidence required to prove your worth, something which seems to change dramatically when you hit your thirties.
Life’s challenges will make you more attune to who you are, where you are going and what you have to offer. The confidence this brings makes it easier to put yourself out there and makes communicating with women far more natural and easier to do, making the dating game far less terrifying.

You know what you want

pic3
By your thirties, you have likely gone through scores of breakups and dealt with flings and girlfriends who were prime examples of what you didn’t need in your life. Each of these incidences have had something to teach you.
You now know what you want in a woman beyond a buxom bosom, smooth skin and an exceptional bedside manner. You now know what a potential partner should bring to your life beyond immediate attraction.

Is she self-centered? Can she engage you in intelligent conversations? Does she compliment your personality? Questions like these can only really be answered once you have sifted through the fun-girls of your twenties and realized why they weren’t right for you.

You’ve played all the bitter games and so has she

By the time you hit your thirties, you have likely been jaded by scores of failed relationships and behavior unbecoming of a human. Silly childish games, unwarranted jealousy and infidelity can all be attributed to the folly of youth.
By the time you hit your thirties, however, you have played each variety of these relational games for dominance, meaning you can spot them from a mile away and move on without wasting your time.

Author Bio:
Mark Greene of Mens Axis is a lifestyle professional writer and digital nomad with a keen interest in men’s mental and physical health, life hacks, grooming, men’s fashion, sex, dating, career and overall day to day solutions for men. The world, according to him, is what you make of it. So go out there and make it amazing.

Second Thoughts On Those We Rejected….

woman-waiting-by-phone_or4tvc

She was perfectly fine, a partner at a law firm and owned several horses.  Looks wise she was what we call a 7 out of 10.  The problem was that I was still crushing hard on the blonde that had just abruptly left because her former BF of 10 years had gotten hitched not long after they split.

Man, even in the parking lot when I went to kiss her on the cheek she went for my lips.

Fuck.

Its been too long – I never called her back, I deleted her number, all her texts and any remnants of her on match and kept looking – but I’ve never found one as good.  Even a good friend of mine lambasted me for screwing the pooch on that one.  “You must be an expert judge of character to call it quits after just one date”.

And he was exactly right..

Any attempt to contact her would be a disrespectful lie on my behalf.  “Oh, so sorry, I was busy”  – but she’s seen me active on match damn near daily since.

There has been others too, hell, one from about 3 weeks ago.  We were to meet at a coffee shop, I got there first – just as the place was closing.  I waited outside and was laughing as she walked up with the current status.  Turns out neither one of us had eaten dinner yet so we ended up at a Thai place close by and we had a very fun, chatty and romantic date.  I deleted her number too.

Is this a sign that I am getting closer, or more stupid?

 

 

Don’t “Chemistry” Yourself Off A Cliff

dating chemistry

“So sorry, I didn’t feel any chemistry”

How many of you have heard (or said) that in the online dating world?

Now – did you say, or even know about chemistry when you fell for your high school sweetheart or other organic relationships?  I am going to assume no – you likely fell over a period of time and different emotions.  This may have taken days, weeks or months – not a few notes passed across the classroom (texts) and one juice together (wine/beer) in the cafeteria (bar).

See where I am going with this?

I get it – and have lived it, first date fireworks are fucking awesome – but my organic relationships  lasted longer than my online ones – where literal nukes went off on the first dates in the form of “chemistry”.

So that said, I just want to say, don’t have so many crazy expectations for a first date – what you really want is compatibility, likeability and attraction.  If those things are met, yes, meet up again.