The Doctor

-No image available, couldn’t find a hot female Dr image that was as hot as her-

Literal days after the PR representative of the Happn app e-mailed me wondering if I would like to chat with the Happn Canada head (because of this blog), which I agreed to and had a great conversation with – I met the Dr. – through the app which I had signed up to days before they contacted me.

We had crossed paths around my place.  The app matches you with people you cross paths with within 250 meters.

In our case we assume it was when I was grocery shopping and she was at her next-to-the-grocery-store-dentist.  Crossing paths as the app markets itself might work for mall workers or students, not so much in our case, or anyone that travels by highway, but I’ll take it.

We spent about a day messaging on the app before she gave me her number and we switched to texting.  We quickly had a connection and textemistry – and I even broke my own rules by calling her during one of our textversations – which only made our seriously intense bond grow deeper.

I had to keep telling myself “you’ve done this before, it never ends well, just meet and deal with the fallout”.

I even told her this.

Her being a gorgeous petite brunette, curves in all the right places, a crazy side, a soft side, a super-funny side and everything else required to make me super attracted to her in a devilishly addictive cocktail of attraction.

I set the date at a quiet spot near her on the other side of the city, figuring we’d meet around 7 or maybe 8pm – she shot back with 9:30.

Me: 9:30?

Her: I have to do my hair, is that too late babe?

Me: You don’t have to do your hair all up, really, forget it.

Her: No, I want to look nice for you and I am doing my hair, it takes time.

Me: Ok, 9:30 is fine, I just checked and they are open until 12:00am so no worries.

Her: They are only open until 12?  Aren’t you open all night?

Me: Yes babe, bring PJ’s in case

Her: Should I maybe just come there

Me: Yes you should

(leaving out lots of come and go testing stuff, childs play)

And so it was set, a first date, after much texting and calling was set for my place.  I quickly tidied up and awaited her arrival and potentially a failure of epic proportion.

She called when she was close, I gave her directions to park and told her I would run down to meet her.

As I rounded the corner to see her outside my condo she was in an in-depth conversation with another brunette that was walking her dog.

I thought oh shit, she ran into someone she knows and this is going to be super awkward.  I could tell which one she was but kinda held back as I had no idea what was going on or even how to approach it.

Backstory – She was walking to where I said I would meet her and started petting brunettes dog.  Brunette with dog told her how she had just got home from a date, so she told her she was just going on one.

This was when I arrived.

Brunette with dog said to her “You are meeting at his place for your first date!”

Her:  Ahahaha Yes!

No wonder BWD looked at me so oddly

Regardless, after a quick hello we were headed into my place.

She was absolutely gorgeous, bubbly, high energy and funny.  She also brought me some expensive boxed whiskey which she asked for some because she was nervous and I obliged.

She had told me before she loved horror movies but had nobody to watch them with, so that was the genre we would pick.  We picked a horrible 2 star POS but quickly were wrapped up into each others arms on the couch.

Our physical chemistry beat out the terrible movie and we moved to bed, still clothed, under the covers, cuddling and whispering / kissing about the journey we had taken to get here and how crazy it all was.

She was over again the next day and our connection has only grown stronger. She’s also coming back in the morning after her shift for the 3rd day in a row.

I will be back for updates…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Male Bumble Review

Welcome to bumble

I know that I said I hated free dating apps and sites, but a few days ago I bit the bullet and downloaded Bumble.  I also had to make a dummy Facebook account because I tossed my original one into the trash 5 years ago.

For those that don’t know, its a swipe app and after you are matched, the woman has to reply first within 24hrs of matching, and we have to reply back within 24hrs or you lose your shot.

Observation #1 is that almost all of the girls on it are beautiful – my initial run through had me literally trying to find ones that weren’t right-swipe worthy, and it was hard.  But I digress, looks alone are great in your 20’s but I desire a wee bit more than that in my 30’s and unless they tell you about themselves in the short bio, you are left to go off nothing but looks, location, age and (optional) career + education.

How about height?  I am 6 foot and don’t want to swipe on anyone taller.

Religion? I love and celebrate Christmas and other Christian holidays and its an instant deal breaker if you don’t.

Body type?  Self explanatory.

The other issue here is the widely discussed algorithm they have in place for men.  When I first signed up and started swiping I got about 5 or 6 matches and was messaged by 3 ladies.  Pretty normal I thought, until later on I realized I had swiped hundreds of profiles and the matches all but stopped – and I wanted to know why so I did some digging.

Basically, new male members are sent to the bottom of the barrel and have to work their way up to be shown to the more popular members based on how many right swipes we get over time.  I assume the first batch of matches I got was a little taste of the top to convince me to not insta-delete the app out of frustration.  From my research other men experienced the same thing right after signing up.

Fair enough I thought, over a week or so I should have generated enough right swipes to be “in the show” but even this was flawed.  Apparently many men right swipe everyone which in-turn makes almost every right swipe for women a match which bogs down the entire system.  It could be weeks or months before a girl I right-swiped on today even comes across my profile.

I’ve also scrolled though at least 15 previous dates hanging out on here so this has been like a reunion, with a left swipe adios.

I am at 4 days in and I get 1, maybe 2 matches a day and I have pretty much stopped swiping so it can catch up.  Oh, I take it you have noticed the image up there – here’s another

It’s not just guys……

UPDATE: 4/15/17

I am now finally getting quality matches, I assume I qualified to Bumbles standards?  Women I match with tend to message within the hour or not at all.  I will updated later.

Final Update:

I didn’t like it, whenever I was messaging with a girl I could tell I was just one of many dudes she was juggling.  Lots of one word answers, not asking me questions on top of the aforementioned algorithm debacle makes me have to give this app two thumbs down.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mrs Red Flag City

She had sent me a message on match but her profile only had one picture and it wasn’t of her – it was of an ocean.  I quickly told her I need to see what she looks like – she says she took them all down due to receiving “weird messages from men”.

That was the first red flag.

She uploads a blurry head shot, then a couple more showing her very nice body, I am game.  So we start chatting.  She had been through a (I assume rough) divorce 2-3 years prior and told me she had taken quite a bit of time to heal and get her mojo back, which is understandable.  We seem to gel pretty well, so I go for the date and she shoots me down!  She says she had her tonsils pulled 3 weeks ago and she’s still healing from that!

There’s the second red flag.

Our slew of messages has now deteriorated to maybe one a day as I have no idea what this chicks deal is, but she continues to send messages – now asking things you ask in person.  Personality types, what am I looking for, where do I see myself in 5 years type questions.  I send a sly answer and firmly ask again for the meet and she agrees.  I tell her I’ll find a nice spot at the half way point and she likes the idea.

I find a really nice, quiet cafe, booth style seating, nice ambiance – perfect for a first date, but remember what I am dealing with.

Yeah – she said that wasn’t going to work as she used to live in the area (big town with a population of 200,000) and she was fearful of running into someone she knows, and asks if I can pick another spot in the next town over.

3rd red flag, you’re outta here!

I told her this was never going to work, she had way too many rules and restrictions – among whatever the hell else was causing her to act like that.

Wanna know what she responded with?

“Nothing ventured nothing gained”

Someone needs to heed their own advice.

The end.

 

The Usual, Alright Date.

Oh really, wow, great.

Oh really, wow, great.

The alright date – you know the one, you meet, have a decent conversation over a couple of drinks, chat about your careers, life, family, whatever – then pay the bill, end with a short hug in the parking lot  and never see or attempt to see each other ever again.

*Note – If she’s hot, the guy will always go for the 2nd date, just as an attempt to hook-up, but 9 times out of 10 she felt the same (and isn’t looking for hook-ups) will send you a polite rejection note, which you will laugh off.   This part seems very unclear for “20’s daters” especially women, who are into the guy, get railed once or twice and then ghosted.  That’s why.  No fireworks went off for both parties.

Anyways….

These regular, vanilla, “dates” are what make up the bulk of any dating life.

I’ve been on six of them since Christmas.  No butterflies, no fireworks – just a friendly piece of time spent with a stranger (lets call it what it is).

These are the ones that piss off your friends, making them call you “picky” or that you are wasting your time online dating overall.   “Well you better pick one of them, you’re getting older” – thanks for the inspiration!

So keep that in mind if you are venturing into the land of online dating – some dates will be awesome, some will royally suck – but most will just be alright, with someone you’d end up as friends with under any other circumstance – but you aren’t looking for friends.